Identity Crisis

They :  so where are you from ?

Me    :  (sigh  followed by a long pause) .Born in Varanasi , 25 yrs of brought up in Hyd . currently living in Bangalore and parents moved to Delhi.

They :  wow , u born in the land of nirvana ...

Me    :  I haven't even tasted  Banarasi pan till now but yes that earthiness flows in my  blood .

They (the south Indian types) : you are a Delhi waali na ? btw , couldn't  even learn Telugu in 25 years,what a shame!!

Me  : no , i am no way Delhi waali and "naku telugu lo mata-pata antha vastundi".

They (the north Indian types) : you are a complete Madrasi nai, btw what is "kuchki"?

Me   :  Anything down MP is Madras for some Northies.Nope , haven't been to Chennai ever. But ya i am more of a south Indian.

They (The generic Indian types who watch star news a lot ) : Yadav , so you are from Bihar? you don't look like .You look like a Punjabi.

Me :  Nope , Bihari n me  ?  haven't  you noticed i say "sh" as "sh" only.

Punjabi ? all i had was some diluted Punjabi friends who are settled in Hyd.

Well , frankly speaking , i don't know , i don't feel owning to any state.  

 I like Hyd,  it has memories of ma growing years  and I love Bangalore as it offered the much needed change. I am yet to learn from  Delhi to be ruthless n strong  and not get hurt by small things. I invite change  , if i am not pursuing, it comes automatically to me for that matter it comes to everyone .And i am more fond of south than north, simply because i have more to identify with.

If readers are pitying me  for  this geographical disorientation , then welcome to this post , you really need to read further.

Living in one city for many years reaps more of fundamentalism than belongings .

I often encounter exemplary southies  stating their hatred towards northies and vice-versa . The classification is not just limited to north-south divide of compass ; I had a  Marathi roommate who openly stated her dislike towards Telugu people ; Punjabi friend complained  about  Tam politics In Satyam ; A konkani friend annoyed of Delhities obvious  rash, show off  behavior ; a UP friend warning guys of  Bong girls -"Jadugarnian " stay away from dating them .A bong roommate terming Punjabi men as women beaters ,ecetera,  ecetera .....
Harsh -blunt , generalizing , unfair statements .we all  might have passed a few.

However, for some strange reason , in all these conversations  i ended up defending the accused region.Being a"civilian" defense kid ,  my growing years made me mingle with local Indian migrants   .This makes easier for me to  be able to gel , understand and get along with cultural diffusion. Not that others are devoid of this exposure but social  DNA  i feel  defines its roots during  adolescence .Later people just network ,bonds and  emotional notions embed  much younger.  Of course exception exists , youth is subjective  term  and learning is a life long process.

Affinity is obvious because of years of association but acceptance and  giving space is necessary for one to see beyond typicality.Once conquered , one can see beneath the layers of external  facades of  culture :  the beauty of being just human , of being just naked self.

Har Ghar Kuch kehta hai

And nostalgia seeps in .

Hyd home bound good-bye was already pending and S’s moving-on post below has rubbed the yearning yet again .

"A month and a half to go before I leave this place. Will miss each and every little moment I spent here. Right from the moment I walked in and was swept off my feet by this place to the times I have spent in my Balcony overlooking the dimming city lights and incoming morning at 5:30 AM! But most of all I shall miss all the time which I spent with the two most awesome roomies possible on the planet! The goof ups, the cooking and finding the mobile inside the fridge!! :D”
 

I said - "so much more will be missed ,  the cap-less bottles , Victoria secrets ,

Tarot cards , shopping regrets 

Gossip sessions , cooking lessons

Chicken curry ,  pudina paneer

Scramble egg, chair pegs

Movies , books thrill

Internet and Electricity bill,

Long RV walks , beside the swimming pool talks ,

…….. the book- shelf will be empty without you , so will be our hearts.

btw , you forgot belan in fridge"
                                                                                                  

PS0: Yeah, our "cold" fridge has seen it all :)

PS1: FB  must provide export-thread-to-blog option, na ?

Indeed time flies . It has been over 10 months since I left Hyd, since I left my old-self  to be a new-self which again will eventually fade away.

I graduated from that clumsy 2 bhk to a  furnished 3 bhk .From  that bloody psycho *&^%$# owner who never returned the advance to the one who never bothers to a ping us for Monthly rent.

Well ,I don’t exactly miss much .Frankly speaking  my memories are too faint to miss anybody or anything for that matter .But its that moment when people bid adieu - a sinking feeling quietly oozes in.

But as they say people make places . I will always cherish the multi – lingual , multi-cultural, multi- cuisine , unify-friendly experience i had /have with my  UPite ,Andhra , Marathi ,  Bong and Tam roomies .And if you leave the origins apart it was and is a family away from family .

S stayed for few months and is a ribbon friend from school days .Amidst all cooking ,school revamp  ,skype-ing, girly fun , chatting , partying, wedding preps and packing  ....we forgot that the only photo we clicked together is in lacy corsets!

I know you loved the home more that us :P, drama queen!
But the tears shed and the bye-bye hugs  definitely were , as emotional as the ones happening  on your bidai . 
I say,  there was more drama going inside than outside :)
 

She completed, bonded  us and  the home together .
Now , some random left out papers, empty cosmetic bottles fill the dreaded silence of that room .Tomorrow the maid will clean that as well.
 

PS2: Sayonara .

Of Last Visit to Comet and Other Alvida’s to Plan

Don’t go by his cute innocent looks.

This is how the monster welcomed me.Seems , tic tac toe is his favorite game.

And this is what I did to him.

Ma fish dog.
Swimming in the blues.
****************************************************************************

Sometimes love and hate are on the same side of the court .Both are extreme feelings no?

PS0: Season of farewells .
PS1: Some people left me.
PS2: Now it’s my turn to leave them.
PS3: And the author is blank. No prose , verses , rhymes are clicking .But one has to pen down so many goodbyes.
PS4: As, the countdown begins ………………………………

Sheetal Hamsa

PS: .(post composed -09/08/08)Shud have released earlier .Would have been more seasonal. Reason for delay-> Samay, waqth and such.

Now this is what u call “ghanghor varsha” . It was frequent some years back , i mean the “Continuous one” (days and nights non-stop) .The frequency of “ Continuous one” executed 3 to 4 times previously and now it has reduced .This time we have encountered only once(Friday evening 08-08-08 to Sunday early morning 10-08-08).

Rains rewind be back to my colony days. I still remember the magnificent cloudy sky over the greeny landscape of the huge park in front of my eyes(notice the rhyme ppl). Come back!

So it s was all "Continuous rain" phase which kept us at home even on weekend. Though I am more inclined towards relaxing in the nest. But that fine Saturday ,the adventurous me decided to venture out in wild. Just me and my roomy’s blue umbrella . An illusion of mild drizzle and a mirage hope of cease fire from clouds at around 6:00 PM pushed me out of the house. Rains+traffic Jams+ a young girl + non-Hyd commuter +dressed up in western +Begumpet/Banjarahills area = are enough for our Hyd Autowallas to demand sky high prizes.
And this is what we do:-
First if the money he asks for is triple the actual amount ,I completely ignore and move on to next.
If the money is ~double .I ask for reasons

Auto wala: “Madam Barish!”
Me: slightly in hyderabadi istyle make him realize that we are aware of the routes and corresponding fares. Then I proudly cote the approx fare and demand for meter.
Auto wala: “Petrol rate bad gaye, uppar se traffic jam Mydam.”
Me: “Uske liye petrol rate sych card hai na. Barish kal se horahee hai to ajj kam log bahar nikalenge , upar se Saturday matlab kam traffic .Agar phir bhee jam hua to mein meter se paise badh ke dungee”.
Auto wala : Now he has no reasons to defend. He becomes reluctant.
Me :It started raining heavily , I gave up in spite of winning the battle , “ok chalo 30(he comes down from 40) to Somajiguda circle”.

Somebody said “ Kabhee ladkoan aur Taxi/Auto waloan ke peechey nahee bhagtey.Ek gaya to 10 atey hain !

Oh forgot to mention for what I was going out –
Hair cut !yes hair cut on a rainy day.
Yes ,hair cut on a rainy day which costs 1000 bucks.
Yes, hair cut on a rainy day , which costs 1000 bucks, to the same parlor to correct my last times disastrous haircut which also costed 1000 bucks.
Yes, hair cut on a rainy day , which costs 1000 bucks, to the same parlor to correct my last times disastrous haircut which also costed 1000 bucks and the disaster happened again.Damn it !

If the boys out there are wondering what is astonishing about cutting hair on a rainy day, here is some gyaan .Rain makes ur hair highly frizzy. Any styles like- rolling, setting etc.. which is offered by default to every hair cut in any ladies parlors, don’t stay. Mind u , that setting doesn’t last longer not even a day.(somebody arzzed- “char din ki chandni hai phir purani raat hai”).Hence usually girls don’t prefer hair cut under such situations. Even now it’s not making any sense to guys ,then stand or stroll in front of any parlor and notice what goes in and what comes out :D

Anyways , after getting slightly drenched we reached the Ferry’s (yes the same place ,where 1000 bucks hair cut happens).Hard luck ,the unit was closed owning to the culprit- “ghanghor varsha”- Continuous one.
The rains furry became more intense .Now what?
We enter a Jeweller shop and kill ½ hour time by spending 200.
We enter another shop -Neerus and again kill time- only 10 minutes. Sometimes it’s nice to be fat -when nothing fits u properly u won’t do a binge shopping, hence can kill time in the garment shop free of cost.
There was no sign of down pour reduction .I entered eatery joint and decided to arrange for the dinner-paw bhaji plus Dosa Parcel.

Enough waiting .Me and my roomy’s blue umbrella decided to start our home bound journey. No Autos, only water clogged roads ,gloomy darkness everywhere and me walking alone on the road amidst faintly lighted traffic lights and ironically less vehicles . Have mercy !!
The umbrella was no longer able to shield me from –"ghanghor varsha". Anyhows with no other option left I started walking/crossing main road . To add to the misery ,I saw road turning into a pool and traffic narrowing to slightly available earthly right corner. I was stuck ! 3 feet water pool in front of me, mad horning traffic behind me and a bunch of idiotically looking guys laughing teasingly , at left corner. Again "lightening stuck.....types"…a generous bus driver came for rescue, he stopped the bus and I immediately hopped in.
And what I saw? SHEETAL HAMSA -When did APSRTC started AC public transport buses? When o When ?

Moral1 of the story : AC buses for public transport. Slightly more cost == less crowd==peaceful travel.
Moral2:Yes, sometimes u must venture out during rainy days== adventurous == fun==dangerous == From some Aamir khans add “ make and learn from your own mistakes yaar ”.

PS1: Look who is taking ?as if I am a frequent bus commuter.
PS2:Arz Kiya hai .......

यूँ तो हर मौसम कट जाता है
बस एक बर्सात का मौसम तेरी याद दिलाता है
यूँ तो जीवन भी कट जाएगा
पर क्या करून, हर साल बर्सात का मौसम तो आयेगा