Identity Crisis

They :  so where are you from ?

Me    :  (sigh  followed by a long pause) .Born in Varanasi , 25 yrs of brought up in Hyd . currently living in Bangalore and parents moved to Delhi.

They :  wow , u born in the land of nirvana ...

Me    :  I haven't even tasted  Banarasi pan till now but yes that earthiness flows in my  blood .

They (the south Indian types) : you are a Delhi waali na ? btw , couldn't  even learn Telugu in 25 years,what a shame!!

Me  : no , i am no way Delhi waali and "naku telugu lo mata-pata antha vastundi".

They (the north Indian types) : you are a complete Madrasi nai, btw what is "kuchki"?

Me   :  Anything down MP is Madras for some Northies.Nope , haven't been to Chennai ever. But ya i am more of a south Indian.

They (The generic Indian types who watch star news a lot ) : Yadav , so you are from Bihar? you don't look like .You look like a Punjabi.

Me :  Nope , Bihari n me  ?  haven't  you noticed i say "sh" as "sh" only.

Punjabi ? all i had was some diluted Punjabi friends who are settled in Hyd.

Well , frankly speaking , i don't know , i don't feel owning to any state.  

 I like Hyd,  it has memories of ma growing years  and I love Bangalore as it offered the much needed change. I am yet to learn from  Delhi to be ruthless n strong  and not get hurt by small things. I invite change  , if i am not pursuing, it comes automatically to me for that matter it comes to everyone .And i am more fond of south than north, simply because i have more to identify with.

If readers are pitying me  for  this geographical disorientation , then welcome to this post , you really need to read further.

Living in one city for many years reaps more of fundamentalism than belongings .

I often encounter exemplary southies  stating their hatred towards northies and vice-versa . The classification is not just limited to north-south divide of compass ; I had a  Marathi roommate who openly stated her dislike towards Telugu people ; Punjabi friend complained  about  Tam politics In Satyam ; A konkani friend annoyed of Delhities obvious  rash, show off  behavior ; a UP friend warning guys of  Bong girls -"Jadugarnian " stay away from dating them .A bong roommate terming Punjabi men as women beaters ,ecetera,  ecetera .....
Harsh -blunt , generalizing , unfair statements .we all  might have passed a few.

However, for some strange reason , in all these conversations  i ended up defending the accused region.Being a"civilian" defense kid ,  my growing years made me mingle with local Indian migrants   .This makes easier for me to  be able to gel , understand and get along with cultural diffusion. Not that others are devoid of this exposure but social  DNA  i feel  defines its roots during  adolescence .Later people just network ,bonds and  emotional notions embed  much younger.  Of course exception exists , youth is subjective  term  and learning is a life long process.

Affinity is obvious because of years of association but acceptance and  giving space is necessary for one to see beyond typicality.Once conquered , one can see beneath the layers of external  facades of  culture :  the beauty of being just human , of being just naked self.